Six days have passed, six inconsequential days. On the eight day (the first of the six days), I managed to write about 500 words. Afterwards, no progress has been made. My right knee is sore and my achilles tendons are hurting as well. The muscle pain hasn't gone away completely.
I had reduced smoking, almost to one or two a day; but that too has increased. Yesterday, I smoked seven. I have been missing my cross-training as well.
I have serious doubts about my writing capability. I am experiencing too many mood swings, and those who know me don't know what to make of my varied moods. I feel low most of the times, experiencing euphoria once in a while, which, strangely doesn't translate into anything.
I am losing the grip.
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The Untold Story of India's Maoist Movement
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Hello, Bastar
The Untold Story of India's Maoist Movement
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about me
- Rahul Pandita
- Delhi-based conflict writer. Author of "Hello, Bastar: The Untold Story of India's Maoist Movement" (Tranquebar Press), and co- author of Hachette India's non-fiction book of 2010,"The Absent State".
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previous posts, index
- "Hello (1)
- 1857 revolt (1)
- 1947 (1)
- A Journey from Kashmir to London (1)
- A Poem in Hindi (1)
- A Story in Continuum (1)
- Aamir Khan (1)
- Abida Parveen (1)
- Agha Shahid Ali (2)
- Agnivesh (1)
- Ajmer (1)
- AK-47 (1)
- Amarnath (1)
- Amritsar (1)
- Anuradha Ghandy (1)
- Army in Kashmir (1)
- Arundhati Roy (1)
- Ascetics (1)
- Ayodhya (1)
- Azad (1)
- Babita Pandey (1)
- Bakery (1)
- Bal Thackeray (1)
- balcony (1)
- Barog (1)
- Bastar (2)
- Bastar" (1)
- Batalvi (1)
- Begum Akhtar (1)
- Bellow (1)
- Besra (1)
- Between the pages (1)
- Bhagat Singh (1)
- Bhindranwale (2)
- Bomai (1)
- Brass Band (1)
- cafe (1)
- Calculus (1)
- Calvin and Hobbes (1)
- Campaign In Rajasthan (1)
- Candy (1)
- Carlsberg (1)
- Carpets (1)
- Cawnpore (1)
- Chandigarh (2)
- Chaplin (1)
- Charbagh (1)
- Chess and Nirvana: A travel along the Ganges (1)
- Child soldiers (2)
- Cholera (1)
- City (2)
- Cobra forces (1)
- Coffee (1)
- Colombo (1)
- CPI(Maoist) (8)
- CPM (1)
- Cricket (1)
- CRPF (2)
- curtains (1)
- Dal Lake (3)
- Dalit (1)
- Dandakaranya (1)
- Dantewada (1)
- Dausa (1)
- Delhi (1)
- demon (1)
- Dhoni (1)
- Dignity of the dead (1)
- Doordarshan (1)
- dreams (1)
- Election (1)
- English (1)
- erectile (1)
- essay (18)
- Faizabad (1)
- Family tree (1)
- fiction (10)
- Fidayeen (1)
- Flower dreams (1)
- Flowers (1)
- Frangipani (1)
- Gadchiroli (1)
- Ganapathi interview (1)
- Gandhigiri (1)
- Garhwal (1)
- Ghost (1)
- graphic novel (1)
- Grenades (1)
- Gujarat (1)
- Gujjar (1)
- Gulzar (1)
- Gurgaon (1)
- Gymnastics (1)
- Habbakadal (1)
- Half marathon (1)
- Half Tomato Boiled Sparrow Eggs (1)
- happiness (1)
- Hari Kunzru (1)
- Haridwar (1)
- Harud (2)
- Heads I win tails you lose (1)
- heart rate (1)
- Heat stroke (1)
- Heinrich Boll (1)
- Hemingway (2)
- hemlock (1)
- Her Master's voice (1)
- Hindi blog (1)
- Home (1)
- Hotels in Kasauli (1)
- Houses for you (1)
- humor (1)
- Hypergraphia (1)
- Hypocrisy (1)
- I want to cry (1)
- IDP camps (2)
- If I turn blind tonight (1)
- In search of a poet (1)
- India Shining in Khairlanji (1)
- India Social Forum 2006 (1)
- Indian television (1)
- Indira Gandhi (1)
- Insurgency (1)
- Jagjit Singh (1)
- Jahangir chowk (1)
- Jammu Roughcut (1)
- Jharkhand (3)
- Jhitka forest (1)
- JK Police (1)
- Kabab (1)
- Kabir Katrina and Ketchup Dreams (1)
- Kalidasa (1)
- Kangri (1)
- Kasauli (2)
- Kashmir (27)
- Kashmir lit fest (1)
- Kashyap (1)
- Kehwa (1)
- Khalistan (1)
- Kobad Ghandy (2)
- Lakshmibai (1)
- Lal Chowk (1)
- Lalgarh (2)
- Landless in Punjab (1)
- Lansdowne (1)
- Life (2)
- Literature (1)
- Loan (1)
- LOC (1)
- loneliness (3)
- love (3)
- LTTE (2)
- Lucknow (2)
- Manmohan Singh (1)
- Maoists (9)
- Marquez (1)
- Meerut (1)
- Meeting Big B on NH 8 (1)
- memory (1)
- migration (1)
- Militants (1)
- Mind wanders in Meerut (1)
- Mining (1)
- Misir Besra (1)
- Mobile phone (1)
- Monaco Biscuits (1)
- Mountains (1)
- mutiny (1)
- My Mother's 22 Rooms (1)
- my name is Khan (1)
- Narcissus (1)
- Nawhatta (1)
- Naxalite (2)
- Naxalites (2)
- Naxals (1)
- Neelesh Misra (2)
- Neelmat Purana (1)
- No sleeping last night (1)
- Nonsense offerings of Peace (1)
- NREGA (1)
- NREGS (1)
- NSD (1)
- Obituaries (1)
- Of Horses and Illustrations (1)
- Of Human Bondage (1)
- Olympics (1)
- Only one Dream (1)
- Opium (1)
- Paash (1)
- Padmini Kolhapure (1)
- pain (1)
- Pandits (1)
- Peanuts (1)
- Philip Roth (1)
- Pilgrimmage (1)
- Pine (1)
- Pizza (1)
- PLGA (1)
- Poems (1)
- poetry (19)
- Postman Bouncing High (1)
- poverty (1)
- Prashant Rahi (1)
- Pratibha's remarriage? (1)
- Prayer beads (1)
- Premchand (1)
- Pubs (1)
- Punjab (1)
- Punjab: A Bihar in Making? (1)
- pursuit (1)
- Qawwali (1)
- Rahul Pandita (2)
- Railway (1)
- Raincoat (1)
- Rains (1)
- Rajapaksa (1)
- Rajasthan (2)
- Razia Sultan (1)
- Refugees (1)
- reporting (10)
- Reservation (1)
- Retinas on Nanda Devi (1)
- Rishi Kapoor (1)
- Ritusamhara (1)
- Roganjosh (1)
- Rum (1)
- Running (3)
- Sadhu (1)
- Safdar Hashmi (2)
- Sarai (1)
- scent (1)
- shahrukh Khan (1)
- Shaivism (1)
- Shankaracharya (1)
- Shirt (1)
- Shivratri (1)
- Should I take you to Shaheen? (1)
- Shrine (1)
- Sinhalese flag (1)
- soaps (1)
- SOG (1)
- Someone peeps into me (1)
- Squirrel (1)
- Sri Lanka (2)
- Srinagar Jammu Delhi (1)
- stories (1)
- Sufi (1)
- Suicide squad (2)
- Sukhna Lake (1)
- Sunday (1)
- Susheela Raman (1)
- Sylvia Plath (1)
- Taare Zameen Par (1)
- Tahaan (1)
- Tamil refugees (1)
- Tamil Tigers (2)
- tea (1)
- Terrorism (1)
- That Night of 1990 (1)
- The Absent State (1)
- The cherry stain (1)
- The Continuum so far (1)
- The Design of Madness (1)
- The Elbow Cream (1)
- The Life of Pandey Ji (1)
- The Missing Man (1)
- The Missing Man (Part 4) (1)
- The Missing Man (Parts 2 and 3) (1)
- The Quest for a House (1)
- The Sampaati Club (1)
- The scarecrows of Kolezari (1)
- The shades of his evening (1)
- Then and Now (1)
- This Characterless String (1)
- This Morning (1)
- Three friends and days of leisure (1)
- Time of parting (1)
- travel (1)
- tribesmen attack (1)
- Triglycerides (1)
- Trincomalee (2)
- TRP (1)
- Turgenev (1)
- TV says: Et tu Rahul? (1)
- typewriter (1)
- Untouchables (1)
- Uttarakhand (1)
- vomit (1)
- Washing machine (1)
- Watchmen (1)
- watermelon (1)
- Weekend getaways (1)
- Weston (1)
- Where is Swadesh Deepak? (1)
- windows (1)
- wine (1)
- Write (1)
- writing (1)
- You have come what for? (1)
- Your almond eyes (1)
- Your Painter yours only (1)
- उड़ीसा (1)
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6 comments:
..those who know you well, know that you will complete this book before December 31st '09. Much before it brother. You are going to do it, and the knee pain will vanish with more thoughts coming in like rain.
Bhe chusai praran.. Asyi kar chu chon at ur firangi reporters club ? ;-)
Hope you feel better Rahul.
While it is important to finish your book (and you will), I believe at times, it is more important to be at peace within yourself to be able to bring out your creative best. Nothing is permanent and I am certain you will be fine soon. Though a lot of times, the emotional turmoil does create some fabulous posts, evident on your blog itself. Continue writing; we are all eagerly waiting for your posts and the Last Man from Kashmir.
Rahul....why are u feeling low & doubting your writing skills?
Am sure you will feel better soon & remember you can't loose the grip....
Prayer's & love,
Radhika
Don't loose grip brother. I'm eagerly waiting to know and read your novel. U r a classic writer and a person also(my observation). Just do it..i know u will.
What's up Rahul. Where have you been?
a great effort.
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